On thursday i broke up with my girlfriend. It was going to happen sooner or later. It's just that we were not meant to be togther. she's way too in the closet for me. She's just a way bitchier, annoying, less intresting version of me. I should have just stayed friends with her instead of turing a friendship into a romance. I couldn't take all the arguments and all her jelousy. I SWEAR it drove me insane everytime she brought up my ex. she'd all ways text me 24/7 and never have an intresting conversation. Then out of the blue she'd feel the need to bring up the subject of my mother, which i didn't very much appriciate. I gave the relationship a chance just like everyone told me and now i have an ex girlfriend who is a creepy stalker. I can't wait until school ends. I'll be way to happy.
Even through all that drama i had to endure i'd say i've learned somethings and gained some insight. I think I was in love with her but its just her actions that pushed me away from her. Now most of the time i'm avoiding her which is hard because she's in my second period and she basically knows my class schedule. Now i belive that she told her friends and now everyone thinks i'm some kind of heartless bitch, which would just reinforce the rumors Alease and her "friends" spread around about me. (eye roll) I don't mean to be so mean to her but i'm trying to not send mixed signals to her. I'm not going to keep walking her to class, writing her poems, walking her to the bus. I just want some space and i'm trying to send the message that a "us" won't ever be happening again. Is that so mean? Is that so wrong? If it is fuck it because i'm just trying to be truthful and i can't and won't sugar coat anyhting for anyone. Why the fuck can't i get along with my ex's? Geez. While i was trying to explain this to Adrinne( girlfriend i just broke up with BTW.) on walk to the bus after we broke up I believe Mr.Colbert heard us arguging and i think he thinks were just a couple of fighting lesbians he has to worry about. which is impossible because i'm not a lesbian. I wish people would get that through their thick skulls. I'm bisexual BIG diffrence.
On other notes;
June 16th i'll be moving to Texas to stay with my dad. I'm very excited about this even though my leaving date has been pushed back due to my father going out of town for a buisness trip. I was suppose to leave on the 29th of May the day after school ends. Oh well this gives me time to read the Sleeping Beauty Triology by anne rice.
I'll write more later!